I never fully understood or appreciated how much free time I had before becoming a mom. Becoming a mother changed me, filling my heart with joy, love, and gratitude. But it also took a lot from me. It took my free time, my tranquility, and my moments for myself. Navigating the demands of caring for a baby while trying to find time for myself was overwhelming. It took me a long time to find my balance between parenthood and personal time, and even longer to realize that personal time as a mom is not selfish; it is necessary for your mental and emotional well-being.
In this blog post, I share some strategies that helped me carve out personal time as a new mom to maintain a healthy and happy well-being.
Understanding the Need for Balance
Before we dive into strategies for carving out personal time, let’s discuss why it’s so important. Balancing parenthood with personal time can be very challenging. At times, it might seem like eliminating personal time from your already full plate is the solution to reducing your load.
Motherhood brings a host of emotional and physical demands that can leave you feeling exhausted and overwhelmed. Finding the right balance between parenthood and personal time is crucial for maintaining your sanity and well-being.
Personal time is a Necessity
Personal time is often mistakenly viewed as a luxury that moms shouldn’t indulge in. Many believe that personal time is selfish and can be postponed for new moms, but this is far from true. Personal time is essential for recharging and reconnecting with yourself. It helps reduce stress, prevent burnout, and improve your overall mental health. By taking some personal time as a mom, you are also setting a positive example for your little ones, showing how to find balance in life.
Even small amounts of time spent on activities you enjoy can significantly boost your mood and energy levels. These moments are important for replenishing your energy and ensuring you can be a present and happy mom.
5 Effective Strategies to Make Time for Yourself
1- Create a Flexible Schedule
Both babies and moms thrive from a consistent schedule. For babies, a predictable yet flexible routine helps them anticipate what comes next, which can promote a sense of saftey and smoother transitions throughout the day. For mom, a structured routine helps in better time management, allows for effective planning and reduces stress of dealing with unexpected challenges.
When creating a daily schedule, concentrate on key activities that form the foundation for your day. These core activities, such as nap times, feeding times, and bedtime routines, should be the central elements around which other tasks revolve. Use time blocks to organize your day, but stay flexible. Some days may not go as planned, and that’s perfectly fine—being adaptable is essential for finding your balance. Remember to avoid overloading your schedule and set realistic goals about what can be accomplished in a day without burning out.
Make “me-time” a part of your schedule, treating it as a core activity, just like feeding or napping. Plan ahead for larger activities you enjoy, such as going out with friends or visiting the spa, and aim to do these once a week. Additionally, incoporate self-care into your daily routine by enjoying activities like listening to a podcast while walking the baby in the stroller or blasting your favorite tunes while doing household chores
By creating a structured yet flexible schedule and prioritizing personal time, you can find a healthy balance between caring for your baby and taking care of yourself.
2- Delegate and Ask for Help
This is a challenging for new moms. Modern motherhood often creates the expectation that moms should handle everything on their own, with asking for help being seen as a sign of inadequacy. However, it’s important to remember that it truly takes a village. Reach out for support from your partner, family, friends, or even consider hiring help if needed. If you’re not yet comfortable delegating baby-related tasks, start by seeking help with other chores like cooking or cleaning until you feel more at ease.
When you’re ready to delegate baby-related tasks, choose someone you completely trust and be specific about the support you need, such as saying, “Can you watch the baby for an hour while I take a nap?” Selecting the right person is crucial for ensuring you feel comfortable and can truly enjoy your “me-time.” Don’t hesitate to set clear guidelines and communicate any dos and don’ts regarding your baby. This will help ensure that everyone is on the same page and prevent any misunderstandings.
Take this step at your own pace, but involve your partner in the process to ensure you can find time for yourself.
3- Set Healthy Boundaries
Establishing healthy boundaries is crucial for managing the demands of motherhood. It’s perfectly acceptable to say “no” to outings or activities that might drain your energy. Setting specific visiting hours and clearly communicating your limits with friends and family helps create a supportive environment and ensures that your schedule includes time for what matters most to you. Declining additional responsibilities or requests that could overwhelm you is not a negative action; rather, it’s essential for maintaining your well-being and using your time effectively.
By protecting your personal time, you ensure that you have the necessary space to recharge, which ultimately benefits both you and your family.
4- Simplify Household Tasks
Some household tasks can be streamlined to make your daily routine more manageable and save you time.
Depending on where you live, use delivery services available in your area to simplify your life. Have your groceries delivered, arrange for regular diaper deliveries, and use delivery options for household essentials to minimize trips to the supermarket. In some locations, you can even access meal delivery services that offer prepared meals, reducing the time you spend cooking.
If delivery services aren’t an option or you prefer to cook your own meals, plan ahead and consider batch cooking. Set aside one day each week to plan your meals and prepare large portions of lunch and dinner for the week. Store some of these meals in the freezer (make sure to check which meals freeze well and the best storage methods). This way, you’ll have convenient, ready-to-eat meals on hand for those busy days when cooking isn’t feasible. Also, check if your supermarket offers pre-chopped vegetables, as this can significantly cut down on preparation time.
5- Embrace Flexibility as Part of your Schedule
Motherhood is full of surprises, and despite the best-laid plans, not every day will go as expected. Babies are little individuals, not machines, and they will have days when they nap less or more, refuse to eat, or become unusually fussy. Embracing adaptability during those times can help prevent feelings of overwhelm. Understanding that these unexpected situations are a normal part of parenting is crucial for navigating the ups and downs smoothly.
Flexibility fosters resilience. When your plans change, focus on what tasks are most important to you and make the necessary adjustments. For example, if your baby misses a nap, consider moving bedtime earlier, or if you’re having a tougher day than usual, don’t hesitate to ask for extra help.
At the end of the day, instead of feeling frustrated that your day didn’t go as planned, celebrate your ability to adapt to unexpected situations. Recognize your flexibility as a major personal achievement, reflect on what strategies worked well, and think about improvements for next time. Because, trust me, there will always be a next time!
Finding the right balance between motherhood and personal time can be challenging, and might take a while, but it’s important in ensuring your overall mental well-being. By creating a structured yet flexible schedule, delegating certain tasks, and prioritizing ‘me-time’, you can manage the demands of parenting while ensuring you have time for yourself to recharge. Remember that it’s about finding the right balance for you and your family, and ensuring a healthier and happier Mama!
If you haven’t done so yet, check out our Self Care Challenge to start incorporating self care into your routine today!
